December 30, 2013

Every Note

  Ever have one of those moments where nothing seemed to go just the way you planned? Or made a video and everything did not sound right? Well, I did, lots of them. The past few weeks seem to have been just like that. I thought I had the perfect plans but nothing seemed to go as planned. Just when that was happening--everything started to not sound right. Every place I turned nothing seemed to sound clear and I kept getting only parts of the puzzle that fits into the world around me. Needless to say I got frustrated, more than once. My cochlear implants were functioning just fine...I even tried on a spare from the hospital and everything was just the same.
  After many sleepless nights, sighs and a few tears, I took a deep breath and started to change the way I prayed. Rather than praying and asking God to take this challenge or trial away...I prayed for strength and the ability to keep moving forward. I was hoping I would all the sudden feel this great strength come over me...but that did not happen. With Christmas only a few days away and my second Christmas away from home I received a Christmas package from home. I was excited to open the box and I did the moment I got back to the apartment. Inside were many little wrapped gifts with scriptures written on each one of them. There was one wrapped gift that really caught my eye. The scripture that was picked for this gift was “For my soul delighteth in the song of the heart; yea, the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me.” (D&C 25:12) When I read that I knew it had to be a CD of some sort. I was having a really rough day and thought “I think I will just open this gift today.” I did and found a CD that was made by my mother. The title for the CD was “Mom’s Music”. My heart started to pound as I had always wanted my mother to record her piano music. I put the CD in the CD player and started to play the songs. I sat really close to the speakers and listened to every note. Every note touched my heart and took me back to the memories of my mother’s piano room growing up. I was able to hear every note from my mother’s music. It was an answer to my prayer...I felt a greater sense of strength that I can keep going.                                                                
         Yes, there are hard days but those sweet, tender music notes reminded me of God’s love. I know that He has been right beside my side every step of the way and through every note I hear. The way He answers prayers are often different than we would like them to; but He knows us better. I may not hear everything the way I want but I know He hears me. 

A Christmas ornament that David got as a young boy as he loved listening to music after getting the Cochlear Implant. He was spend hours with his head close to the radio listening to his favorite songs. It now hangs on the tree every year as a reminder.